Yes, per the subject of this entry, I will
finally be graduating with a B.A. in English Language and Literature. I am very excited! With the exception of obsurity, like being shipwrecked on and Island where you had to continuously capture a monkey for shots of rum, or following in Babes's footsteps by making it to Toyland, I have had about the most bizarre path to an undergraduate degree one could imagine.
Here's a general rundown1. Two years at UMBC (starting in 1998) - Majoring in 10+ different subjects, including SCUBA diving, only to drop out and piss it all away. I accomplished nothing at UMBC. In fact, I used to pretend to drive to school and would instead go see movies and play video games. Part of my failed experience at UMBC was my fault, but the school sucks for unrelated reasons as well.
2. One enrolled semester at C-cubed (Carroll Community College for the uninitiated). I say enrolled, because I never went to a class and I never dropped out. Trust me, this is the easiest way to fail your classes.
3. Then came the three year stint at Zurich working on insurance investigations. There is no other job in the world that makes you hate people as much as being an insurance investigator does. You learn the people are inherently greedy and selfish, and this realization makes you sad because it is the circumstances (the the insurance company imposes on you) that makes the people this way. Also, dealing directly with people claiming McDonald's made them too fat was no picnic.
4. Back to C-cubed. This time I attend classes and retake all the ones I failed previously. I do this because I have a newfound interest in being a teacher and not dealing with adults as much in the working world. Sure, I'll have to deal with parents who want their children to succeed, but that's not so bad (and not the main focus of the job). I prove to myself that I am not an idiot who is unable to be successful at the college level by earning a 4.0 and a Summa Cum Laude A.A. degree.
5. Finally, by 2005, I find myself enrolled at UMCP (University of Maryland, College Park). Oddly enough, this is the school I wanted to attend in the first place, but did not want to take out a loan to dorm. In retrospect, this was extremly foolish, especially since I ended up moving down to the area anyway. I majored in English for my undergraduate studies and happily report that I will be graduating with honors from here as well. My one bad semester (3.2 GPA in this semester due to 4 hard ass professors in one semester - OUCH) will prevent me from being Summa Cum Laude once again, but that isn't such a big deal. I've already been accepted into the graduate school for education, so my grades are no longer important. That being said, I'm still proud that I will graduate with honors from a school that is ranked in the top 20 in both of my programs of study (English and Education). Only, I just wish it didn't take me nine years to earn a four year degree. Okay, six years, if you decide to throw out the three years I spent at Zurich and not enrolled in college. Still, I feel like I took too long. But then again, taking too long is much better than not making it at all. Four years ago, I never thought I'd make it back this far.